Is it just me, or are they skimping on bra fabric?

I feel like the poster girl for the
infinitely-expanding universe theory. 40C! I just have to remember it’s all
potential milk.

My pregnancy also comes
with the following side effects:

1. Not only do
I have a linea nigra, I also have a dark halo around my
soon-to-be-outie navel.

2. I have spots and
rashes all over my chest and back! Acne, bacne, and frontne. Sigh. The teenage
years are soon over, but acne, like corruption in the government and irritating
morning show hosts, persists.

3. Incessant
burping.

4. Incessant sweet
cravings.

5. Serendipitous discoveries of
uncrowded public restrooms. There’s one in the basement of SM in Megamall, near
the shelves of plastic storage boxes.