waste,
And remember what comfort there may be
in owning a piece thereof.
Avoid quiet and
passive persons unless you are in need of
sleep.
Rotate your
tires.
Speak glowingly of those greater
than yourself,
And heed well their advice, even
though they be turkeys.
Know what to kiss and
when.
Consider that two wrongs never make a
right,
But that three lefts
do.
Wherever possible put people on
“HOLD”.
Be comforted that in the face of all
aridity and disillusionment,
And despite the
changing fortunes of time,
There is always a
big future in computer maintenance.
Remember
the Pueblo.
Strive at all times to bend,
fold, spindle and mutilate.
Know yourself. If
you need help, call the FBI.
Exercise caution
in your daily affairs,
Especially with those
persons closest to you;
That lemon on your left
for instance.
Be assured that a walk
through the ocean of most souls,
Would scarcely
get your feet wet.
Fall not in love therefore;
it will stick to your face.
Carefully
surrender the things of youth: birds, clean air, tuna,
Taiwan,
And let not the sands of time get in
your lunch.
For a good time, call
606-4311.
Take heart amid the deepening
gloom that your dog
Is finally getting enough
cheese;
And reflect that whatever fortunes may
be your lot,
It could only be worse in Sioux
City.
You are a fluke of the
Universe.
You have no right to be here, and
whether you can hear it or not,
The Universe is
laughing behind your back.
Therefore make
peace with your God whatever you conceive him to
be,
Hairy Thunderer or Cosmic
Muffin.
With all its hopes, dreams,
promises, and urban renewal,
The world
continues to deteriorate.
Give up.